My husband and I took Friday off work and took a mini vacation down to Dallas mainly to get away from the dogs for the night but we also wanted to go to Ikea.  I love Ikea. I don’t care that it’s massed produced and the quality is probably not the best, I love it. And there’s no way you can sway me. Even if you told me they made furniture out of puppies, I’d still love it.

I knew the trip would be good when we stopped for gas in Oklahoma City on our way out and have a pigeon dove who refused to move out-of-the-way of our car in front of the pump. Here is Doug:

He refused to move until a kind man next to us went to pick him up to move him and he lazily hopped up on the little platform. I thought he liked me, but then I remembered that no animals like me and right after this picture was taken he ran as fast as he could to get away from me.

[Sidenote: I am not even apologizing for these pictures that were taken with my cell phone because let’s be real, they’re no better than what I would have taken with an actual camera.]

I had to take this photo leaning over a dirty, gas station trashcan.  Curse you Doug! How can a pigeon  dove be smart enough to know to hate me?

But I digress…

About an hour into the trip I kept thinking it smelled sort of funky in the car. I started looking around checking everywhere.  I looked down and finally found the culprit.

I somehow managed to get nasty gum on the back of my sweatpants. I cannot imagine anything worse happening.

And that basically sums up my life in a phrase: gum on sweatpants. I think I’m going to start saying “Yeah, cats and dogs go together like gum and sweatpants” in place of oil and water.

I’m a genius.

Update on my genius status: Emily in the comments informed me that Doug was a dove not a pigeon. Which I of course knew all along. I was just testing you, yeah, yeah that’s it.